While attending a movie last night, I was discouraged by the coming attractions. There appear to be very few original ideas in Hollywood. They were for a sequel/book adaptation (Narnia: Prince Caspian), a movie version of a TV show that’s been off the air for a about a week (Sex and the City), a new movie version of a comic book that already got a “new” movie version in !2003! (The Incredible Hulk), a movie version of an old TV show (Get Smart), and some action movie with Angelina Jolie. While the last one is theoretically an original idea, I suspect that it will offer few new ideas to the genre/moviegoing public. Furthermore, I thought I would mention a few others that will be hitting theaters soon.

Indiana Jones 4: The Something of Whatever (So much time has passed that Spielberg had to drop the classic villains of the Nazis in favor of the Soviet Union.  I look forward to Indy 8: The Legend of the Crimson Jihad, in which Indy battles Osama)

The Dark Knight (the second of the “new” Batman movies, following the “old” series of four movies)

Speed Racer (Whatever.  This one’s so old that I don’t know what to say about it)

X-Files 2 (What. the. fuck? Seriously, you wrapped it up nicely. Cancer man got killed, the alien colonization of 2012 was averted, etc. We do not need a stand alone movie co-starring - wait for it - Xzibit. Insert Pimp My Space Ship joke here)

Hellboy II: The Golden Army (why not call it Hellman at this point? *rimshot*)

The Mummy 3: The Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (I kind of want to see this one. Is he the emperor OF dragons? An emperor who happens to be a dragon? The possibilities are endless.)

With this in mind, it struck me that it can’t be that hard to be a movie executive. I also finally got a joke from Spaceballs, itself a spoof of Star Wars, in which one of Mel Brooks’s characters says, “God willing, we’ll all meet again in Spaceballs 2: The Search for More Money.”